The four recognised styles of Parenting

Distinctive styles of parenting were first set out by Diana Baumrind, an American clinical psychologist, back in the 1960’s.  Three styles were initially identified, and a fourth (uninvolved/neglectful), was added a few years later, by researchers at Stanford, Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin.

The theory behind the categorisations, was that a child’s behaviour, could be attributed to the parenting style they experienced as a child at home.

The 4 styles are still used today and are categorised as follows:

·      Authoritarian

·      Authoritative

·      Permissive

·      Uninvolved/Neglectful

Authoritarian parenting style:      Low in responsiveness, high in demandingness

Authoritative parenting style:       High in responsiveness, high in demandingness

Permissive parenting style:           High in responsiveness, low in demandingness

Uninvolved  parenting style:         Low in responsiveness, low in demandingness

Authoritarian Parenting 

Rules feature highly for an authoritarian parent. They believe that children should follow rules that are set out by the parents, and should do so without questioning them.  “Because I said so”, is a much used phrase! The focus is on obedience. Coaching children to problem solve, allowing them choice, independence and a say in how they live their lives, tend to be forfeited in the pursuit of children “doing as they are told”.

Authoritarian parents will lean towards strict punishment rather than the concept of children being guided to learn.

Authoritative Parenting 

An authoritative parenting style puts far more emphasis on a strong connection between child and parent.

Limits and boundaries are in place and are consistently enforced – but they are done empathetically, taking into account a child’s opinions and feelings. Children learn through discipline rather than through being punished. 

An authoritative parent will validate a child’s feelings, while also making it clear that the parent is ultimately in charge.  Authoritative parenting will take into account understanding of natural child development.

Permissive Parenting 

A permissive style of parenting tends towards leniency, with the parent often being concerned about the idea of saying no to their child and wanting to be a friend to them rather than be the adult in the relationship.

Permissive parents do have limits but will often be inconsistent in enforcing these limits and are fearful of their children not liking them.

Uninvolved Parenting 

Uninvolved parents tend to have little knowledge of what their children are doing. There tend to be few rules in the household. Children may not receive much guidance, nurturing or parental attention. There is little emotional connection.

Uninvolved parents expect children to raise themselves. They don't devote much time or energy to meet a child's basic needs. Uninvolved parents may be neglectful but this may not be intentional – they may well be overwhelmed with other issues.