Managing Expectations in the run up to Christmas

For parents, it can often feel that events, such as Christmas and the run up to Christmas, ramp up expectations. Expectations and images of, the perfect day, or of blissful moments making home-made decorations with our children all getting along beautifully! This is not our children’s agenda however – they are not the ones who see this as the end goal. Excitement builds without a doubt, but the pressure for that elusive perfect family time (which doesn’t exist!) comes from outside pressure, which we often then put on ourselves.

So – this year – why not be kind to ourselves – and in turn, be kind to our families. Work out what is important to us – when we spend time doing this – whether it is looking at our family values – or in this case, what we want our family Christmas to look like - it brings clarity, alongside allowing us to look at how we can put this into practice with and for our children.

The run up to Christmas is not the time to put boundaries and limits to one side. Consistent boundaries and limits give our children security and predictability. Parents know their children better than anyone – they know what their children can and can’t manage – so let’s remind ourselves that we can say no during this time – not only to our children but also to others. If activities involve our children being expected to sit still and be quiet for a long time – at a time when they are developmentally unable to, and we know this will be an expectation - this is the time to potentially swerve this particular event (for the time being!)

Investing time and attention in our family life is always a fantastic idea🤗  During the run up to Christmas, let’s remember to include them in the planning of events, as well as in clear explanations of what/when and how things are going to pan out. This can help prevent our children becoming overwhelmed.  A visual calendar for young children – of what is going on day-to-day - alongside a paper chain countdown up to Christmas day itself, are two easy things to action and can be really helpful. As can having some activities up our sleeves – we have included some potential ideas below.  However, if everyone is just exhausted, getting some fresh air and then cuddling up on the sofa is a surefire way of there being no expectation other than to reconnect with each other and enjoy time together!

Christmas may, or may not turn out as we planned!  Memories will be created come what may, and sometimes the best memories come from unplanned and surprising scenarios!  Wishing you all a very Happy Christmas🎄

Some Christmas activities that you and your children may (or may not!) enjoy doing together

 ·      Make a paper chain countdown (Read an Advent/Christmas book alongside)

·      Look at different options for helping others at Christmas. Let’s remember to ask our children

for their input with this. Keeping it local can make it even more impactful

·      Look at making/following a Reverse Advent Calendars as well as having our own

·      Make a few Christmas cards for family/friends and send in the post

·      Make some labels for Christmas presents

·      Make some gingerbread biscuits and decorate – rather than buying a Christmas jumper! The louder the

decoration the better!

·      Start a Winter/Christmas jigsaw (big’ish but appropriate size for child to do with adult) at the start of

December

·     To make wrapping fun – play a game of “Who can wrap a present the fastest” – working in pairs and each

person only using one hand!

·      Ask for some favourite Christmas film choices, write out and put options in a hat and get children to

choose films on different days

·      Look up some festive Christmas snacks and put together a sharing platter

·      Play a Christmas version of “Would you rather”… with Christmas questions such as “Would you rather go to

school wearing a Christmas jumper or dressed up in full Santa kit/get one big present or 10 smaller

presents…..

·      Hide some candy canes around the house and go on a candy cane hunt

·      Have a family Christmas quiz

·      Go out on a Winter Scavenger hunt

·      Go out for a walk and collect pine cones to decorate for the tree

·      Have a chocolate fondue night

·      Play a Christmas version of Charades

·      Choose a place to go and see Christmas lights/festivities

·      If it’s an option – go iceskating

·      Play pass the parcel – with different prizes in between layers - wearing mittens/oven mitts

·      Try to cook/bake something you’ve never made before – perhaps a recipe handed down from a

grandparent or great grandparent

·      Try to find somewhere you can all go carol singing

·      Make some place names – with photos/pictures of people coming over at Christmas time

·      Carve out a few moments each day for a Mindful activity – this could simply be doing some breathing exercises

together, playing a silence game and listening out for what we can hear, going for a walk together and

noticing what we see/hear/smell – or investing in a Mindful Activity Book such as Sitting Still Like a Frog

(Activity Book) by Eline Snel, which can help us to feel calm and grounded.

🎄✨Create new family traditions that work for you and your family!✨🎄