Why bother with self-care?

In the safety briefing on a plane, we are all instructed to put the oxygen mask on ourselves before we put it on our children, but that can somehow feel selfish.  So, is this also how we feel about self-care? That it’s selfish? Would that change, if we reminded ourselves that the reason we’re asked to put the oxygen mask on ourselves first, is because our brains need oxygen in order to function properly.  By first putting the mask on ourselves, it enables us to make better decisions for our families.  Try applying this knowledge to everyday self-care….if we know that our children observe our every move, and take their direction from us, why wouldn’t we want to demonstrate the importance of self-care by showing them what it looks like for us, and letting them see how much we benefit when we take time each day to refill our ‘emotional cups’?

What does self-care look like to you?

We are all different and, on that basis, self-care will look different to each one of us.  If you asked Bella to go for a run, or take a bubble bath, she’d quite literally run for the hills! But offer her a cup of coffee in the quiet of the morning, before everyone else gets up, now you’re talking.  We bet if you took a straw poll of your friends and asked them what they all do for their own self-care, you’d end up with a myriad of ideas.  So, why should our children be any different. 

What works for your child?

Have you ever asked your child what works for them? As parents, we often find ourselves recommending that our children gravitate towards things that we feel are important for self-care.   But what works for one child could be the last thing another needs, or even wants.  Equally, what might work one day might not work on another.   And……. Can we just stop and think how many times we have turned to our devices for succour during this past year, is that not the same for our children?  Maybe it’s time to find out what self-care looks for each member of our family, so that we can remind ourselves of this, when we need it most.

Try it……

It seems like a given - we know that it’s impossible to ‘pour from an empty cup’ and yet we’re still finding it hard to take some ‘self-care medicine’.  Would it help to turn it on its head and ask ourselves – what happens when we don’t take time out for ourselves?  Even 10 minutes every day, will give us time to breathe, take stock and fill our cup, just a little, in order that we can better support our family to help themselves.  What’s selfish about that?

 The long school holidays will soon be here - knowing that it takes 2 weeks to create a habit – can we take some time to create a self-care resource box for US and our family.  We KNOW we’ll all benefit.